Letter from the Editor – August, I extended my grace through you

 August, we extended our grace with you and through you, September, let us show you what we are made of – a short practical guide to graciousness.

We fought for you, we took every trembling bone and strengthen them through every breath we took, inhaling deeply to calm down the nerve-racking experiences we went through. 

Septembers follows in, seamlessly turning a new leaf, from green to bright red. Through the heartaches of August, we filled empty spaces with love, we brought to light the darkest places and as the air becomes crisp, we step into Autumn head held high. 

Finding our own graciousness, the one that comes from within, is always a challenge. Graciousness grows through inner peace and maturity, through experiences and life testing you, but here are the lessons we may bring into September. 

Do not worry, some things can’t be controlled therefore, focus on what you can control. When somethings are eating you up, learn to let go by doing what you can, acting with dignity, respect and kindness, give it all you have, a 100%, a 110% if you can, but once you have, breath in and trust the process. When thinking you are weak, be reassured your heart is strong, when feeling despair, fill your hearts with hope, where you see pain, bring kindness, through every failure and every victory, extend your inner grace. 

Walk the walk, when in need of starting somewhere, start with your body. It is the envelope that contains all of your grace and it is the easiest part to work on when you do not know where to start. Walk your back erect, hold your chin high, sit straight. Move into the world consciously, it is so awfully easy to fall into patterns, into automatic mode, falling into existing in a room without being fully present – take control of your body to avoid it. Be careful of your surroundings, stay alert of others, of inanimate objects but of your own self too.  Observe how you move, how you breathe, refocus on the essential. 

Talk the talk, be mindful of how you speak to others but also to yourself, maybe you have heard this before, but plants grow better when you speak kindly to them, imagine what being kinder can do to a person. People are drawn to kinder spirits, be polite, speak softly and gently, laugh plenty and make sure you use the tongue of kindness.  

Know your values and align with them, sometimes playing the game seems rather fun but trust that at the end of the day, the only person you have to live with is yourself, and no games, no one, no opinion, no arguments, is worth losing your peace of mind or your values over. If everything was taken away from you, the only thing you are left with is yourself, and it should be enough.  

Understanding leads to compassion, this is such a broad line but there two major ideas that remain most important: understand yourself and understand others. Understand your emotions, no negative thought can’t be turned into something positive, show yourself some mercy and take the time to listen to your heart, its chaos deserves the compassion and the empathy only you can give it the peace it craves, and that starts by taking the time to listen. 

If someone is being cruel, or hurtful, only by listening you can see their heart and the pain it feels and maybe then, you will be able to let go of anger, deception or sadness. Truth is, if you keep your emotions, it boils inside you and you get burnt, but if you blow all over, you have to apologize for burning others, and trust that you do not want that, nothing is more horrifying than hurting unnecessarily others. Therefore, let the steam go by your ears, listen, and find it in your soul to show compassion, all bad reactions are simply a sequel of hurtfulness, past trauma and insecurities, they do not need to be fought, they simply don’t know how to be understood.

Don’t take what you don’t need, Don’t give what you don’t have, the world is a balance of give and take, where there is an imbalance, there is chaos, it’s inevitable. We have seen it in the course of history, in relationships, in our own lives, big scale to little scale, nature itself is made that way, the basic principle of life is the harmony between the two.

A few things that can be given that can help tremendously are time, patience, compassion, space, friendship, love, boundaries and so many more. You can give a hand and an ear to who may need, but make sure they are available before giving them in, a gracious spirit demands that you have two hands and two ears, one of each you may keep for yourself – one can not give what one does not have for his or herself first. Remember that. 

August was the lesson and September is your chance to show what you have learnt. School is starting, feel inspired by it, even for the ones in the school of life – it is all about learning to be a better version of yourself, you hold the power of making that decision every day. Be the student and the teacher wherever you can and see how you grow. We often limit our potential to what we know, maybe it is time for you to expand your horizons. The only limits you have are the ones you impose on yourself. Food for thought.

May September be full of growth and may all of your obstacles be conquered with brilliance and strength, as always,

I believe in you, 

xx Your boldest friend

Photo by Efdal YILDIZ

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